It's daytime! Yaaaaaaaaaay!

Ok, so I thought I do another post to talk about what's happened since we've been home with Ben. It's been so much fun and I'm on my last day of paternity leave as we speak :( but I thought I was due for an update.

The first night was rough...to say the least. We experienced a little something called "cluster feeding" that we weren't really prepared for. This usually happens when a mother is breastfeeding because the milk doesn't really come in for a few days. So the child doesn't really get enough to eat during that time and needs to catch up. Well, it happened to Ben. We would feed him and then a half hour or so later, he'd be screaming for more. Problem is, we didn't realize at the time what he was screaming for. We thought we had just fed him so it couldn't be that he's hungry...well it was. It was a little scary. Ben hadn't cried much up until that point but when he wants to...lets just say he's got a good set of lungs on him. He reaches this higher octave that I can't describe other than to say he sounds like a pterodactyl. I even briefly considered doing a pterodactyl theme in his room instead of a baseball theme. Oh, well, he was the cutest pterodactyl I've ever seen!

Jenni's mom came to stay with us the next day and stayed through last Wednesday. She was a HUGE help. She stayed up with him on Sunday night so Jenni and I could get some rest. She also did laundry, cooked, cleaned and basically treated us like royalty. It was much appreciated. She was wonderful.

Ben had his first doctor appointment last Monday and was doing great. Doctor V said he has great muscle tone and is WAY ahead of where he should be physically. He was holding his head up on his own for extended periods of time at this point and he was less than a week old! Doctor V let him grip is fingers and lifted him up and Ben was able to keep his head in line with his back...something that isn't typical until week 3 or so. Doctor V told me to start lifting weights because Ben will be kicking my butt in no time!

So the only real issue we've had since the pterodactyl incident is that little Ben has had his days and nights confused. This is pretty typical though and seems like it's getting better. When he starts to doze a little more than he should, one of us will say "It's daytime!" and we'll both go "Yaaaaaaaay". Seems to wake him a little. Plus it's fun and cute for us to say. This has gotten a little better in the last few nights and he's been awake more during the daytime. Hopefully that trend continues!

We have been slammed with vistors and phone calls since we've been home. I want to thank everyone for their support and well-wishes. Everything is going great and we are sooooo happy to be a family.

The next post I make will be a picture update...I'm overdue on that as well...and we have some good ones!

Bye for now,

Jeff

It's raining...it's pouring

I just wanted to make a quick post here...it's been a little while since I have. We had our baby shower this past Sunday up in Canton. "Wow" is all I can say. Little Ben is definitely spoiled! Thank you all so much for the wonderful gifts and for coming to support our family!

By the way, for those that didn't notice or realize it, I put my video camera in the carrier when I brought Ben into the shower towards the end...and yes, it was on. I caught some hilarious footage of you all "coochie coochie cooing" Ben and whether you like it or not, it will be eventually posted here. It's going to take some editing because there is a lot of dead space and some stuff is out of frame, but wow it's funny. ;)

See ya,
Jeff

The Final 72 Hours

Ok, for those that don't know, when a child is adopted at birth, it is required by law that the birthmother waits 72 hours prior to signing the permanent surrender paperwork. So, I wanted to write a little bit about what that 72 hours was like for us.

We were told during our adoption training that adopting a child would be an emotional rollercoaster that could be one of the toughest things we've ever had to deal with. I will admit, that my thoughts on that were "Bullsh!t. We've been through so much with all the infertility that this will be a piece of cake." Well, I'm an idiot. I wasn't really prepared for the whole thing. It was very very difficult to do the interviews with the birthmothers. It was very very difficult to wait for the verdicts. It was just very very difficult in general. It was difficult for the simple fact that the decision on whether or not Jenni and I would be parents was in someone else's hands. It didn't matter who it was. We just had no control over the situation and I can't begin to explain how difficult that was.

Anyway, back to what I started to write about. When Natalie (birthmom, she has given me permission, so from here on out, I will refer to her by name) selected us to be the parents of Ben, she was just two weeks away from her due date. That seemed like such a short amount of time to do all the things we needed to do to get ready. Well, a week and a half later, we were ready, and from that point, it seemed like an eternity. I knew this 72 hour period was looming and despite the fact that everything had gone so well, there is always a chance that Natalie could have changed her mind during that 72 hours. I was a complete mess from about the time we were ready until he was born. Usually, I'm the laid back one and Jenni is the one who's all over the place. But it was the exact opposite with this. I was so afraid of that 72 hours that I didn't know what to do with myself. I just wanted it to be over. I had come to terms with the fact that Natalie could change her mind and had decided in my heart of hearts that if she did, I would have been happy for the both of them. But that doesn't change the fact that it would have completely devastated me. I'd never been so close to being a parent...so close to being a daddy.

Our adoption caseworker had warned us that this 72 hours would be the most difficult time of our lives. I was afraid I would get attached and get my heart broken. But, the truth is, Natalie's family (and neighbors) kept that from happening. From the moment we arrived at the hopsital, they treated Jenni and I as if we were part of their family. There was never a single awkward moment and I'm sure you all can imagine that this could have been a very awkward situation. But it wasn't. At all. At least not for us.

We all hung out in the waiting room together, talking and passing the time. When the announcement came that Momma and baby were both fine, the first thing Natalie's father did was jump up, hug the both of us and congratulate us on being parents. Natalie asked for Jenni and I to come in and see the baby first. Natalie's mother took some fantastic photos of Jenni and I holding Ben for the first time so I'm posting those below.

Speaking of Natalie's mother...she was having a very difficult time with the adoption. And I can't blame her at all. Jenni and I were very empathetic. We didn't for one second lose sight of the fact that this would be a very difficult thing to go through for both Natalie and her family. The day after Ben was born, Natalie's mother brought in an outfit for him, in a gift bag, and handed it to us. It was a very moving moment for Jenni and I and meant the world to us. We had his hospital pictures taken in that outfit as a gesture to her.

We hung out with Natalie's family on a couple of occassions when they came to visit her and Ben in the days after he was born. We truly enjoyed their company and the fact is, they made that 72 hours SOOOOOO much easier than I thought it would be. We also got the chance to hang out with Natalie...just the FOUR of us on a couple of occassions and I truly enjoyed that as well.

Natalie was discharged from the hospital on Friday, April 18th. We had a very special goodbye visit where Natalie said goodbye to us and to her precious son. What a very tough thing to do. What a very strong woman. There were lots of tears and lots of hugs...Natalie never once made us feel like we weren't welcome or that there was anything to worry about. I enjoyed hanging out with Natalie's younger sister that day. I talked her in to feeding Ben on a couple of occassions. It was very cute. I could have squeezed the shizzle out of her.

On the last day, I was calm. Jenni was not. We really had no warning signs that Natalie would change her mind, but there was always that chance until she signed the paperwork. The adoption caseworker had an appointment scheduled to meet with Natalie at her house to sign the paperwork at 7:25pm (exactly 72 hours from the time Ben was born). We waited, anxiously, by the phone. We were in the nursery...we wanted to be holding Ben when we recieved the news. We got the call at 7:57pm...we were expecting the caseworker to call us. But when we got the call, it wasn't from the caseworker at all. It was from Natalie. Not only did she sign the paperwork...but she wanted to be the one to tell us. What an amazing, amazing woman. I have nothing but admiration and respect for her. How difficult it must have been to sign that paperwork and for her to still want to call us and tell us herself meant more to us than anything I could EVER imagine.

So, when I was on the phone with Natalie, she asked me if the 72 hours was hard. Even after being through what she had been through, she was concerned if it was hard for me. So selfless. I gave her the short answer because I was so overwhelmed with joy that I had just officially become a daddy that I didn't really know what to say. So, Natalie, here's the long answer. You and your family are amazing. I adore you all. It would have been much harder without you all and I want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Love always,
Jeff (and Jenni)

Introducing...Benjamin Ryan Breckenridge (Part 1)

Wusssssssup??!!! PUNCH IT OUT!

Mommy feeding Ben!

Completely and deeply in love!

I will post more about the whole experience and about our first night at home with our new son. But right now, we have lots of company and our hands are full! But I wanted to get some pictures up due to popular demand!

Love,
Jeff

Introducing...Benjamin Ryan Breckenridge (Part 2)

He's here!

(I'm hijacking a computer here at the hospital to make this post, so I'll make this one brief)

Ben was welcomed to the world on April 16th at 7:25pm. He was 8 pounds, 13 ounces and 20.8 inches long. He's got a little head of hair as well! He has gone 5 hours between feedings and has had to be woken up each time to eat. He's not a crier (at this point) and only fusses when you mess with him or try to change his diaper.

He's perfect!

I'll post more when I have a chance!

Peace,
Jeff (and Jenni)

Tick...tock...tick...tock

Hello, and welcome to Ben Waiting! My wife and I are about to become parents and I wanted to create a blog so that the many friends and family that we have out of town will be able to keep up with us and our soon to be son, Ben. I will be posting pictures and linking to videos. You may notice a video bar on the right side of this page...it's empty now but won't be for long. This will link to my YouTube account which is also currently empty.

Just a little history to help those who care and to bore those that don't. My wife and I have been trying to become parents for about 7 years now. It's been a tough road to say the least. But we've persevered with the wonderful support of our friends and family. We decided to adopt a child last summer...having infertility issues is tough. There is a growth process and a healing process which we both went through to get to the point where we're at. But we're there and I'm so happy we are because in less than a week, we are going to be the parents of a little boy!

About three weeks ago, we were selected by Ben's birthmother to parent her son. I will never forget the moment that she asked us to be the parents. I will probably post more about this later, because this is supposed to be an intro blog, not a long-drawn out diatribe. I won't give her name at the moment because I haven't asked her permission...but she is a wonderful woman who Jenni and I have become very enamoured with. She has changed our lives. And for that, I owe her mine. I also won't give any more details about this just yet...not until I discuss it with her.

For those that don't know, I'm a web designer and am currently working on a complete site which will serve the same function as this "cookie cutter" blog. For now, though, considering we only got two weeks notice on becoming parents, this will have to do. I'm about to be very busy (they say) so that project will have to take a back seat to the actual parenting part!

Ben was due on April 9th...currently 5 days late and counting. An inducement date was scheduled for this Thursday, April 17th at 5am. Won't be long now!

Enough for now. Welcome, and feel free to post feedback, help, advice, or just generally go off. Tune in for regular updates and pictures/videos.

Peace!
Jeff